and now a little bit of ho wisdom from the doll

the doll has all the answers

no, she didn't do the walk of shame at arcadia high and deliver another after-school-special type of speech......it's fanmail time. whenever i get on my knees and begin to thank my lucky stars that the doll isn't answering fanmail anymore, another installation - most likely made possible by whatever slimy squad of heroin junkies that still read the shit - is released. *sigh* right when you think it's been buried, the doll grabs her favorite shovel and digs it back up.

now, while most women are fighting the good fight against man for equality, kathleen is busy telling her army of riot grrrls to "be a bad bitch" and pretty much milk your boyfriend for everything that's in his savings account.

the wisdom :

Q: Where are you right now?
A: with ur boyfriend lmao
Q: Why spending so much time at Arcadia High?
A: WUT CAN I SAY? i really love these high school boys.....see, i get older - they stay the same age
Q: Let me guess - you were only at Arcadia High School to be apart of Show and Tell?
A: guess again! he needed a ride + not the kind ur thinking
Q: I see now...can I get a ride? I'm on the corner of Cahuenga and Sunset...
A: ass, cash or grass - no one rides 4 free in the gravedigger
Q: Were you preppy in high school or a burnout? I really can't tell with you...
A: HOMECOMING QUEEN, PART-TIME MODEL + HEAD CHEERLEADER
Q: I just read you installment in this month's Pretty People Club - first of all, welcome back! Secondly, who in the hell is Ponyboy?
A: his real name is none of ur beeswax and he's jimmy's best pal, best buddy, longtime confidant and right hand man. he does mustang repair and is basically an all-american boy : eats apple pie, drives a mustang, plays lacrosse, his favorite food is cheeseburgers...
Q: What are your plans for the holidays?
A: try not to get arrested - if i do, write santa lickety split and ask 4 the charges to be dropped
Q: What did you get your loved ones for Christmas?
A: 1ST OF ALL WE CELEBRATE HANUKKAH IN THIS HOUSE BETTER RECOGNIZE
#2 DO I LOOK STUPID? WAIT DON;T ANSWER THAT
Q: What do you want for Christmas?
A: i asked santa for 100 pairs of fake eyelashes, a 1970s emboridered disco pantsuit, a copy of armageddon, to hire a professional blunt and/or doobie roller, to never pay taxes again, quaaludes to come back in style, a new pair of black riot grrrl boots, some crystals for my altar, a rose of jericho for good luck, shady lake to be finished already, a lifetime suppy of fake eyelashes and peace on earth
Q: Do you really think the 312 Dollhouse on "Skid Row" in Arcadia is the best place to raise your baby girl?
A: OUTER SPACE WOULD BE BEST - me and my blood are too good for this planet, we should really spread our good sense elsewhere in the universe
Q: How is Quetzy?
A: baby is fine she is just being the world's most coolest and hardxcore baby....she is generally either with ludo watching trashy reality television and learning what not to be like in the future. ludo consistently tries to brainwash her with the gospel of various vapid "celebrities" and i consistently have to reverse the effects with hours of making Q listen to selected rare riot grrrl vinyls
Q: How was Quetzy's first birthday?
A: BETTER THAN URS
Q: Jimmy Kiss was reportedly seen arriving to the Isle of Grimaldi nights before Quetzy's lavish birthday bash and spend that time at your beachfront mansion - did he stay with you?
A: UM YA he's practically my brother-in-law and @ one point it could have been him, so why wouldn't i oblige his old ass with one of our guest bedrooms LMAO
Q: Are you and Jimmy getting back together?
A: the day jimmy and i get back together is the day i grow a full-on unibomber beard
Q: What is your plan with Joey Kiss?
A: i;m on a non-plan plan with him....i take it day by day : some days i want to kill him and make it look like an accident; other days i want to push him down a flight of stairs and make it look like an accident; most days i want to make a litter of kids with him, but honestly a lot of the time i try to scheme up ways to murder him w/o getting caught via forensic evidence
Q: Have you ever used a man?
A: O HUNNAY ALL THE TIME! as a woman you can use ur cootie cat 2 turn any man into a walking ATM and/or a magic genie lamp for whatever ur heart desires
Q: Did you ever use Joey for his money?
A: LOL NO THAT TRICK IS BROKE AS A JOKE!!!!! ROFL! when i said as a woman it's easy 2 just seduce a man to when what you need, i definitely wasn't talking about him. seek maynard b. alberkraut his family is all up in that old arcadia $$$
Q: How would Maynard feel about being used?
A: PRBLY RLLY GR8 WHY / he is rich af and needed guidance on what to spend his hard-earned trust fund $ on

LOL, wow. while some women are fighting for equal pay and creating a new stigma for women aside from housewife, kathleen is busy making sure women know their lane and stay in it! IE : a woman's place is in the bedroom and she needs to stay there until she has full access to her man's offshore accounts.

happy hanukkah!

l'chaim, doll!

kathleen came back to life, back to reality today for shabbos dinner for hanukkah with the kiss family. yes, that means jimmy kiss was there and most likely he was in full wet mop force.

word on the street is that joey and kathleen's relationship is barely hanging on by a thread, so this dinner could really be a pivotal moment in keeping them together. so don't burn your JOEY + KAT 4EVA shirts quite yet, ya'll. no word as to if older bro, and shady lake 's executive producer, johnny kiss was in attendance, but grandmama kiss was in the house, which means ludo ludovic - head caretaker and nanny - had the night off to go watch pink flamingos or dance to madonna circa bedtime stories in his room or whatever the hell he does in his free time. it also means shixsa kathleen was preparing her favorite hors d'oeuvres : gefilte fish.

let's take a trip down memory lane to one of the doll's first encounters with the kiss family. she was still dating kiss son number 2, joey, at the time and was happily helping his mother prepare some traditional jewish dishes in the kitchen. just kidding! food is her kryptonite. story goes, instead of cooking, the doll snuck mama kiss shots of whiskey! our girl was supposed to help prepare gefilte fish, but as soon as she saw the ingredients, she turned her nose up and said it looked like "gross dog shit." go figure.

oh, speaking of tradition, uncle jimmy kiss is still in his feelings over his potential future sister-in-law kathleen. he probably sat at the dinner table with his arms crossed and a scowl on his face the whole time. he's that type.

if i was the doll, i would down a handful of sleeping pills ASAP ferg, hold the ferg, and hope to wake up when christmas is over. quetzy will be fine, she has midwife ludo and old head mama kiss to look after her.

happy thanksgiving!

doll is still on a bender

while the rest of the country is stuffing their faces full of food, baby babble is currently shoveling mountains of blow up her nose. loose-lipped brother sodapop cola and resident loudmouth told the media that his sister was still AWOL and probably out doing boatloads of drugs. he reported that kathleen left baby quetzy lux with the nanny almost 2 weeks ago, said, "good luck!" and disappeared off into the fading sun.

very few from heard from her, but, brother sodapop cola, baby daddy joey kiss, wrangler headlock, cook shuggie bo bellski, all of the nasty punks from the lost boys, nanny ludo ludovic, ex-boo jimmy kiss, supposed best friend angel astazia, her publicist, her assistant, everyone at the pretty people headquarters, all her old drug dealers...they all have on thing in common and it's that they haven't gotten one phone call, text message, kite, letter, etc. from our girl. she is totally off the grid.

sodapop did say, though, that a bellboy from the riot house in cielo called joey kiss the other day and said that she had left some personal effects there, including - you guessed it - a big bag of pills!

LOL. i guess we know what the doll is thankful for...

our doll, the ghost

doll goes where no one knows her name

years ago, kathleen's company was so worried about her cracky ways and tired of having to explain why she was consistently late and cracked out at important business functions, so they hired johnny "headlock" to wrangle her scrawny ass in and out of clubs. headlock has lived with her ever since and is basically a father figure, part-time savior and full-time shining light in the doll's life.

well, he should be fired because after all these years in the job, he should know better than to sleep on the doll! she is as elusive and quick as the wind - one minute you see her, the next minute she's gone!

it's typical of 2011 doll to do this but i thought she turned over a new leaf!! i mean, she ditched her gross, black tar heroin-stained ballet slippers; her homage to 1960s housewives-looking ratty blonde beehive; her kinderwhore babydoll dresses; her hippie witch 1970s mood rings....i could go on.

she has since replaced her 2011 look with a slightly updated and more glamorous 2K15 version and we have all been applauding in her direction since. however, she seemed to have kept some of her old habits and managed to give headlock the slip several days ago while shopping. she hasn't been heard from since and headlock has sent an all doll points bulletin to baby daddy kiss, the police and all major drug dealers in the area for her safe return.

i'm sure she's fine, holed up in a penthouse suite somewhere with a boytoy and a large pile of white powder. she'll be back....when she runs out of petty cash or when she runs out of fake eyelashes - trust.

happy 1st birthday baby q!

baby quetzy lux turns the big 1!

happy birthday quetzy! it seems like just yesterday your mother and our reigning queen of the tabloids, kathleen, announced that she was knocked up with you and from that moment on, the whole world impatiently awaited your arrival.

to celebrate their money (and quetzy luxy sunshine whatchamacallit's first birthday), kathleen and joey temporarily stopped throwing shade at each other to throw a mini music festival in the backyard of their grimaldi mansion - "the coco cave" - this afternoon. there was a ferris wheel, food carts, teepees, a bounce house, two music stages, a makeshift tattoo parlor, face painting for deadbeat dads, carnival rides, a fireworks show and all sorts of other pointless shit that only rich people can afford...

i have a feeling quetzy lux will fondly remember her first birthday party when, in 15 years, she tells her therapist that it's the first memory she has of looking at her family and wishing she was born to a pack of wild coyotes instead of a pack of it-crowd junkies.

the party was a hit but i honestly i couldn't tell you if quetzy was even at her own party because she wasn't in any of the released pictures. come to think of it - she was probably having her own party with her real family : her nannies, drivers and bodyguards. #fame

and while quetzy was totally styled in baby couture with swarovski diapers and a gilded crystal baby bottle; the doll was looking a little rough around the edges. kathleen looked like she was styled by cocaine. she was obviously paying an homage to herself via 2006-2008 and i really just want to applaud her for not finding the nearest mirror, ripping it off the wall and doing lines all day...even though she looked like it...

doll makes a £100,000 mistake

"BFF" material or nah?

kathleen lost argosy's heirloom diamond ring...and her car...all in one day.

even though the doll has a garage full of antique and exotic automobiles alike, she asked to borrow argosy's brand new, barbie pink corvette convertible to run errands today while in arcadia.

first, she stopped by the market to pick up some accouterments for dinner; then to the baby store to buy baby q some diapers; and lastly, she stopped by her spot on skid row to check in with joey kiss. it was there, outside of the original dollhouse, that the convertible was hot wired and stolen. the car was worth over £80,000. also inside was an heirloom ring circa WWII that belonged to angel's grandmother, appraised at over £10,000. gulp.

okay, my first question is : WTF? isn't our girl nursing a broken ankle or what she's trying to pass off as a broken ankle? what leg is she driving with? and have the good people of arcadia been forewarned that their reigning queen is speeding around town in a barbie car - like a racecar driver - top down, high on pain pills? just wondering.

my second question is : how is visiting joey kiss an "errand"? we all know she was going in for a quickie and that's great, but call a spade a spade, doll! don't say you're buying groceries when you're really getting your cootie cat taken care of. *sighs*

so what did we learn? basically if your phone ever rings and the doll is on the other end, asking if she can borrow your car for "a couple of hours" for "errands," just start speaking chinese and hang up as quickly as possible.

doll to pen a book of pictures

LOL, yes, you read that right

the last time author and legend, kathleen "the doll" grace, sat down to write a book, it was 2013 and she wrote ☺ and the planets realigned because of it, because ☺ is everything. i'm not 100% sure, but i believe there is a copy of ☺ in every library in the world, because that's how important it is to mankind. well, now in addition to ♥, she will also be creating a book of polaroids to accompany her long awaited sequel.

according to kathleen's personal relations rep - aka sodapop - the book won't be full of pictures detailing drug use, wasted celebrity friends, upscale bourgeois VIP riot house parties and other heavy shit worth note, instead it will be a selection of choice photos that further illustrate the life of our doll.

ugh. boring! sounds like it's going to be a lot of selfies, a lot of joey kiss with his hair slicked back and a cigarette pack rolled up into his tee-shirt, and a couple pictures of baby q drooling on toys. yawn! need more doll smoking doobies on the toilet, drunk 'it' girls puking on their designer clothes and sex. otherwise, i'm not shelling out upwards of £20 to look at a book that should be rated PG-13.

the doll commented on her new book, which doesn't have a name right now, by saying : "i am over the moon to share my personal photographs with fans. i don't want to disappoint."

i have a good idea for the name of her book. she should call it :the doll : a disappointing look at my life in pictures, minus the drug use, threesomes and bloodletting. it'll be flying off bookshelves everywhere by 2016!

doll rolls ankle in grimaldi

our girl is such a clumsy clown!

baby mama kathleen and her counterpart joey kiss are currently on a lovely family holiday with baby quetzalith lux on the isle of 8-balls. she was bike riding with joey today throughout the island when, in a series of quick, unfortunate, unplanned, shambolic movements, she took a tumble. i wanted to add 'cat-like' and 'graceful' there, but i can't because kathleen actually injured herself. no word on if she was super drunk at the time, but my guess is hell yes, totally yes, she was...

anyways, joey kiss, in a series of actions similar to that of a greek god, scooped up his girl and carried her to the nearest business until an ambulance came. yes, a fucking ambulance.

she was immediately rushed to hospital and treated as if she had just been in a major automobile accident. she emerged from the ER in a walking cast hours later and skipped happily off into the sunset with a prescription for heavy duty pain pills. hurrah!

doll takes long weekend in grimaldi

she's in town to work the local homeless shelter, donate scholarships to junior riot grrrls and scout a preschool for baby q

...just kidding! she's landed on the isle of grimaldi to shop baby daddy joey kiss' money at boutique shops, walk on the strip with baby q in the pram and lounge poolside with books from the local library. she is definitely not in town to work or do anything of substance. unless it's cocaine. or heroin. she's quite partial to both.

the two kisses landed and dropped baby q off at their penthouse in downtown grimaldi, just minutes away from their luxurious cocoanut gables mansion. the mansion is also minutes from "the strip" - aka front street - which could easily pass as the sister to bethel boulevard in cielo, where the original, doll-owned riot house stands. front street is home to the many nightclubs, bars, restaurants and hotels of hustling, bustling grimaldi and within walking distance from kathleen's coco cave. one of the favorites of the couple is the historical playboy club, modeled after the famous magazine. the two have been snapped by the paps there several times, looking very disheveled and like kathleen was channeling 2012's spirit to come and revamp her body.

the isle holds a rich history and many celebrities have resided there. kathleen's home was formerly owned by toca trocadero, notorious nightclub and bar owner who founded the clubs that populate the strip still to this day.

now, he was said to have been a gangster, during his heyday in the 40s, and that he ran illegal gambling in the back of his establishments.

kathleen, who is familiar with the stories surrounding toca's name, took a nod from one of nightclub designs and in the riot house she has secret passageways between certain rooms, the kitchen, the bar and the VIP area; all of the passageways lead to an exit, a necessity in case of any police presence.

the lost boys reform at the riot house pool party

gulp - kathleen and joey seen dancing together...

in case you're like me and missed the lost boys reforming last night - most likely alongside their old counterparts : heroin, cocaine, booze and punk groupies - let us gather together and spill the tea on everything that went down at the riot house last night.

after rocko j. nasty passed several years ago, the lost boys disbanded, leaving many fans heartbroken and deaf. last night, the band reformed - with newcomer darby combat on lead - and kathleen on tambourine. she seemed awfully close to mr. combat, but that's probably just because she needs to get laid.

nothing else cool really happened (ie: arrests, overdoses, indecent exposures, doll grabbing the mic to curse out hecklers...) and our girl was home by the witching hour to cast spells.

no word as to if she went home with baby daddy joey kiss. photographers inside the event caught her dancing with him and - get this - she was having a good time! i already know what this means : cue joey moving all his crap back into the dollhouse! those two are back together, i just know it! also, i am glad to see joey is back to his natural hair color - being a towhead is not his look and he needs to leave blonde hair to the doll.

doll's new friend is an acid trip

...literally

okay, i am not going to lie - i really thought this angel staz character was going to be a genuinely good influence on the doll, but i was 100% wrong! last night, reporters caught up with her, kathleen and - everyone's favorite - joey kiss! but that's not all! not only were they in the same vicinity together and it didn't involve the doll and staz hauling joey's lifeless body into a ditch, but all three of them were high on LSD!

what is this, woodstock? are we trying to abolish all responsibilities, burn our bras and condemn "the man?" come on, doll! this is 2015! and what are you doing hanging with your ex joey? just because he's a blonde goddess now doesn't change anything!

ok, my next question is : who is babysitting baby Q? the TV?

and of course staz, who is still an amateur to the press game, quietly giggled that they dropped acid to a fan wanting an autograph and probably thought the information wouldn't go elsewhere. staz has obviously not met sodapop "loose lips sink ships" cola! hopefully next time, she'll think twice before she goes bumping her gums to any random tom, dick or harry!

bae dumps argosy like a full ashtray

this is the best picture of argosy...ever

that girl is totally like an ashtray and she really should be dumped....off at the nearest mental institution!

bae baebel dodged a major bullet, took a nod from joey kiss and broke up with short-term girlfriend argosy burns yesterday, much to the pleasure of our doll. bae famously ditched kathleen for argosy and somehow wriggled away to tell the tale. then, right when everyone thought those two would split, argosy confirmed that she was pregnant with his offspring! gulp.

naturally kathleen's next step was to have her fired from her film shady lake. they replaced her character, burned anything she ever touched and everyone on set signed a contract to respond "argosy who?" if anyone mentioned her name. bae, though, not so much....he got off way too easy and has really yet to see any official wrath from the doll. perhaps all the stress of having a newborn baby around is rattling her nerves and therefore weakening her powers.

anyways, as for argosy, hasn't it only been a week since the big baby news? and now argosy is single? that sure didn't take long! i'll try to pretend we're dealing in dog years and not minutes, but...

i'm sure choirs on high could be heard in arcadia as kathleen skipped through the streets, singing, "ding-dong! the witch is dead."

joey kiss is feeling himself as a beautiful blonde

LOL JK; joey kiss gets dumped like a heavy load of bricks

not like he isn't used to it or anything! he told reporters today he is "single again," after some nameless, 20-something, skin and bones blonde model-type - who no one ever bothered to get the name of - broke whatever pieces of heart he has left. in his defense, he probably has a breakup mixtape and a conditioned method of shaking the blues! i do not feel bad for him in any way and honestly my only concern is that he sticks the child support in the mail every month! so what if the doll takes the money to the strip club or shovels it up her nose? IDGAF! he needs to do his job as baby daddy. seriously - if joey can dance and parade around the club with his new monroe-inspired locks, joey can definitely work. and i haven't seen joey 'work' in ages...

anyways, so he went and dyed his hair à la our beautiful blonde doll and apparently he thinks it suits him. if he thinks it will possibly have kathleen turning her head, he can think again! she is focusing super hard on being a good mom, casting spells for protection against argosy, refraining from tons of drug use, rubbing crystals on her forehead and hopefully finishing her masterpiece,♥!!

doll reminds fans she is still the star of the show

our girl answers about shady lake, joey kiss and her baby, quetzy lux büüski  

it is time yet again to gather 'round the campfire, drop out and tune in to the doll answer burning questions from her fanbase. kathleen really must have nothing else going on - other than breastfeeding baby q, screening calls from loser exes joey kiss and bae baebel, reading the shining, and plotting her next move.

if you ask me, she should be finishing her book 💘 and figuring out a way to cameo in shady lake, but yet i digress...

Q: What books are you reading this summer?
A: i am finishing the shining, about to start dirty blonde diaries; i also have tropic of cancer, lolita and everything by didion on my list as well...
Q: Do you think you still got 'it'?
A: AS UR DOLL REGNANT, I DEF STILL GOT 'IT' (wutever it is) + AM STILL ON THE THRONE, SO WATCH IT
Q: Speaking of books, when will 💘 be finished?
A: IT'LL BE DONE WHEN IT'S DONE - if you want it faster, plz send 500K to my lawyer, judah fussganger and i will consider writing an extra page a day....*key word* consider
Q: What about Shady Lake? Is the film still in production?
A: O YA - ARGOSY IS OUT OF THE PICTURE; I AM STARRING NOW, FILM DUE IN SUMMER 2K16
Q: Is Hans Holzy still directing?
A: yes, but only if he promises to not piss me off and to never bring up the time we had sex
Q: How do you really feel about Argosy Burns?
A: FDB
Q: What was the last thing you said to her?
A: ....ho, why is you here?
Q: Do you think Argosy will be a good mother?
A: what i think doesn't really matter...what will be will be...CPS ON SPEEDDIAL THO
Q: Is Argosy aware that you and Bae corresponded while he was in jail?
A: she does now!
Q: When you drop Baby Q off with Joey, what's the first thing you say to him?
A: HA HA HA HA HA; U MAD OR NAH 
Q: What books do you read to Quetzalith at bedtime?
A: the shining, kurt cobain's journals, helter skelter.....she's not a regular kid, she's a "cool" kid...
Q: Are you going to raise the baby with Bae Baebel as the daddy?
A: well damn, i'm trying 2 tell you : if he calls q his baby, that's his baby
Q: Do you think Joey can afford child support?
A: yo no se - he can miss me with all his bullshit though - IF IT AIN'T ABOUT THE M-O-N-E-Y $$$
Q: What did you do after Q's birth?
A: ...went to the strip club, turnt up, smoked a dutch on a stripper's lap, drank a fifth of vodka and then hit the freeway going about 95...why?
Q: Did you really call the police on Joey on the day of Quetzy's birth?
A: hell yeah fucking right 
Q: What's with all the 'fuck this' and 'fuck that?' You used to be so wholesome. 
A: fucking is my favorite word - reason why Q is fucking here
Q: Who is Angel Astazia?
A: my nü best bud and godmother 2 Q
Q: Is Angel famous?
A: it's STAZ + you've seen her before...IN UR DREAMS
Q: Have you really reformed your life since your daughter's birth or is it all a front?
A: it's a front
Q: Have you let Staz corrupt you?
A: she is 20 LOL i doubt it
Q: Will Staz have a role in Shady Lake or assist in production?
A:yes, she will get me iced coffee, cigarettes and handle continuity; because i have smoked one too many doobies to handle such a responsibility 
Q: Speaking of doobies, has Joey ever accused you of being a bad mother? 
A: ....if brains were dynamite, joey couldn't blow his nose : WHAT HE THINKS? I COULD CARE LESS...
Q: How do you feel about Joey now?
A: 50% IDFWU 50% ROFL
Q: How did you come up with Quetzalith's elaborate name? Did Joey have any say?
A: joey never had a say, never will - my baby named herself :
quetzalith means sacred bird
lux means light
büüski means purity
honeyblossom means happiness
zarathustra means freedom
and of course kiss means garbage

ROFL! we all know the kiss' family name stands for next to nothing, but i'm glad she reminded the general public, just in case they were thinking of giving him a pass! baby babble also reminded her ex joey to stay in his lane, and that if he forgets where his lane is - it's right in the back alley where the dumpster lives.

let's throw it wayyyy back

it's time to take a trip back in time! 

no, not to when kathleen was in high school and the above photo was taken...our girl has decided to move back into her famous dollhouse in arcadia.

i think she will always have a soft spot for her first estate, affectionately nicknamed 'the dollhouse,' located at 312 overlook lane. it known as 'skid row' to locals, despite many affluent residents. let us not forget the many booze and drug-filled years hiding out behind it's walls; and let us not forget the tumultuous relationship with wet mop jimmy kiss - despite these bad juju vibes, the doll has selected to move back into her old haunt. even though she has a handful of other homes she could live in that don't house spooky spirits and memories you could file under not good.

baby q, brother sodapop, wrangler headlock, cook shuggie bo bellski and caretaker/nanny ludo ludovic will be joining her, naturally, as her squad. who knows what joey kiss will do concerning his weekly visitations, but honestly, who cares? last anyone checked, he still had a pulse and he was on the planet, so.............

our doll - not the baby mama!

in some news you totally saw coming and are probably not at all shocked to read - argosy is knocked up and bae isn't sure if he's the baby daddy! oh lord. here come the LOLs! hit the laughtrack!

this is all news as of yesterday, when airhead argosy, who must have more floating around in her lower pelvic area than her brain, 'accidentally' dropped (in front of a reporter with a camera) her first ultrasound photo. cue the flashbulbs!

naturally argosy was alone at the ob-gyn, because bae is a good-for-nothing, loser baby daddy type who would probably sooner be seen getting wasted at 9 AM than attending a lamaze class. let's just be real and not lie to ourselves. this is not the man who will be winning father of the year anytime soon.

i am unfazed by this 'revelation', albeit curious. curious as to which rat-infested, crack smoke-filled, garbage pit of a hovel are they going to raise said child in? also, with what income are they planning on supporting their happy new little family with? because those food stamps will only last so long and bae's 8-balls aren't going to buy themselves! argosy is also in no shape whatsoever to be tricking on the boulevard....i could keep the shade coming but i'd really rather not.

also, let's not kid ourselves - that nasty heifer argosy definitely needs a paternity test! if bae ends up being the father of that child, i will have truly seen and heard everything and i have no qualms with retiring on the spot.