merry xmas!

doll friends and family woke up this morning, sat down by the christmas tree and opened presents....just like everybody else. well, everybody but the kiss side of the family, because they already celebrated hanukkah and yawn when the 25th of december comes around.

this year, kathleen went cheap and made joey a scrapbook of ultrasound scans (barf), sodapop a vacation, headlock a new radio to listen to baseball on, shuggie a new set of knives, ludo a raise and promised close-up in shady lake, and the two lost boys rocko j. nasty and loyal were promised a follow-up to L3 M30W. the doll even treated herself to the boxset of sci-fi favorite, twilight zone. 

wow, sounds like the only person who was missing a gift - as usual - was jimmy kiss!

she's in the building and she's feelin' herself

hans von holzy paints sexy pic of doll, gives her mix tape

argosy may be the star of shady lake, but the beautiful one was definitely the star of the show on the set today! it's not even her birthday yet and southern gent hans von holzy haus presented her with a giant canvas of a hand painted, nude doll and a weird, 90s cassette mix tape that he probably found in a box in his parents' attic somewhere. nothing says "i want your bod" like a mix tape does!

now i am 100% sure that all of those magic crystals are increasing the doll's witch powers and holzy haus is just under the influence of a magic love spell. if not magic spell, maybe magic mushroom? poor hans never saw it coming! but you know baby babble did, because she has a crystal ball that can see the future LOL.

kathleen falls fast asleep during important conference call

back in the day, the doll would have waltzed into an important meeting with white powder falling out of her nose, no bra on and she would have thought it was tuesday when it was really friday. but these days she has really been on point, which is why have no theory as to why she passed out today during a phone call with all the movers and shakers of shady lake.

tired from being pregnant?

it's a shame she didn't know hans von holzhausen was on the other end! i'm sure she would have found it within herself to stay awake.

the call wasn't really super important, though, it was to talk about filming locations, schedules and the million dollar brat's notorious rider. no wonder! sounds like a snoozefest. zzzzzzzzz

doll has a crush

shady lake will begin filming after the holidays. argosy burns, daughter of hep parade magazine boss, will be the lead and the newcomer, southern gentleman hans von holzhausen has been named director. johnny kiss was named producer ages ago, and it's probably just because the doll has a crush on him too!

and ever since he was named director, kathleen has been spending an awful lot of time on the movie set. no, i don't think it's because she wants a producer's credit - she has a crush on cutie pie holzhausen!

and no, this isn't just a hunch, sodapop cola told reporters that his sister goes gaga for hans and gets all giddy at the mere mention of long ass WWII name!

while on set, the beautiful one takes it upon herself to get his coffee every morning and conveniently leaves out everyone else. one day she even forgot baby daddy joey! LOL, go figure!

speaking of joey, he is reportedly super jealous and makes it a point to 'drop by' the set alllll the time. probably checking to see if the doll is staying faithful which i am almost 100% sure she isn't. come on joey! this isn't her first ride on the cheating merry-go-round! she at least knows to get a telly.

doll watches twilight zone episode, gets scared, dials 911

sleeps with murder weap by bed

joey kiss better hurry up and finish his (excuse for a heroin bender)  scouting for shady lake, because the doll won't last much longer! she is still alone in arcadia at the kiss cradle and she is beginning to crack. she phoned police at 3 AM after hearing scary noises while watching an equally as scary episode of the twilight zone. you can blame it on the witching hour or she was probably high off her face on cocaine, but the story still remains the same.

kathleen told police that she can't stand being away from joey and gets scared easily - she sleeps with the light on and with a shotgun next to the bed. gulp, a shotgun? that sounds like an accident waiting to happen. i hope joey is aware of this.

in his defense, he tried to say that the doll has a super duper magical unicorn security gate that will protect her from all the weirdos of the world…..

just kidding! it’s 2013 and no one is safe from anything anymore. it's no wonder she's got some firepower at arm's reach - lest we forget she was brutally attacked in arcadia! a security gate doesn't mean shit anymore. if this was a test to prove that he can take care of the doll, he just flunked big time.

joey kiss goes on stag weekend, forgets to tell doll

joey and others leave town to scout locations for shady lake

the doll is all alone in arcadia tonight - joey kiss is out of town in monticello, scouting possible filming locations for shady lake. and he couldn't do it alone! he brought johnny kiss, sodapop and ludo ludovic along for what looks like more of a boys weekend than a business trip. as for headlock and shuggie bo bellski - the two have also taken the weekend off to go to a baseball game in cielo. enter beau badman in 3, 2, 1.....

baby babble told the papers that she plans on spending the weekend soaking in the tub, writing, watching old horror movies, smoking doobies, blasting punk music, having séances, painting her nails, watching the twilight zone, reading her future via tarot cards, planning the wedding of the century, listening to the wolfman jack show, etc...but she will definitely NOT be calling joey kiss for anything!

she told reporters that he hasn't called for 2 days, but sodapop has! and you know the mouth on soda - before long, he had spilled everything.

apparently the crew isn't exclusively scouting for locations, the boys have also taken it upon themselves to party like it's 1999. poor doll. she's just jealous! at home, all alone while the boys are on a stag weekend. oh well, she'll live.

baby babble hires johnny kiss as executive producer

shady lake is surely going down in flames

the shady lake cast and crew is coming together quite swimmingly - we already have argosy burns starring as coco rodriguez; the lost boys are putting the score together and now johnny kiss has been named as executive producer. if you aren't familiar with johnny, he is joey and jimmy's older brother and probably near the top 5 of the doll's to-do list. he is the most muscular of the kiss bunch, having wrestled his high school and college career. but don't think that just because he has some school under his belt doesn't mean he isn't just as greasy as his brothers! he too dons leather jackets, motorcycle boots and ripped denim jeans as well. bummer. thought he would be the one to break the kiss grease curse that affects all males of the family. all i know is - if argosy, who is currently single and johnny, who is also currently single, hook up on the set of shady lake, the doll will be quickly contacting satan for a contract hit. if joey turns out to be a bust, surely the beautiful one will put a love spell on johnny.

the doll doesn't want to talk about babies or suicide

goes on TV to let everyone know

the doll was on a popular grimaldi news programme this afternoon to talk about shady lake. now, the channel might as well have said it was a tell-all interview about joey's suicide and her miscarriage, because the host had a barrage of questions that were 100% off-topic. the interview went something like this:

host: so, kathleen, how's it been going? kathleen: been writing a lot for the upcoming movie, shady lake
host: what has this experience been like?
kathleen: next question.
host: but a lot of people found your miscarriage unbelievably tragic...what did you think about it?
kathleen: you have to be kidding me.
host: and then to have joey, your fiancé, nearly commit suicide. what do you hope the future to hold for you two?
kathleen: *laughs* i can't believe i was dumb enough to book this show.
host: do you still love him?
kathleen: i love him enough for the both of us.

once outside the studio, she bitched and moaned about the interview and said she would put a spell on the host. just kidding! she said she would use her ouija board to communicate with ghostly spirits to haunt the host.

lights, camera, action!

the doll to write screenplay for shady lake

kathleen is such a diva, she can do business anywhere she pleases - from her office at home, to a yacht, to the shores of a private beach, to a disco on another, fancier yacht. today, she signed a deal from argosy's family mansion on the isle of grimaldi for a motion picture, to be called shady lake .

not much is known about the plot yet, but apparently shady lake is based off of a scary story kathleen wrote when she was in 4th grade. obviously it will be revamped for today's audiences. argosy is in talks to star and the doll is currently looking for a male lead and a director. the film will follow a young girl, named coco rodriguez, and her boyfriend as they go camping on shady lake. unbeknownst to them, a psycho killer is on the loose, on foot, and on the way to shady lake!! i bet it will be similar to any great 90s slasher horror movie.

can't wait, sounds like it'll be a scream.