doll exchanges love letters

while bae is in the hole!

oh doll, jail life isn't pretty!

our beautiful queen doll has lately been finding herself #1 clink pen pal to none other than bae baebel, the same pea-brained toad who broke her heart into smithereens not a couple months ago!! only her last couple letters were not returned....commence media blackout!

it didn't take long for the sunshine kid to turn category 5 hurricane bitch and haul her cookies down to the cop shop for some answers! LOL on a scale of 0 to chris brown she was pissed.

the pigs didn't have much to say other than he was punished after guards watched a video visit between the doll and bae. and to answer your question - the shit wasn't PG-13 by any means. so obvio, they took his privileges away, one being letter writing.

OMG i love them they are like a poetic, second rate, straight-to-video version of sid and nancy. next she'll be hanging outside the methadone clinic in fishnet tights, smoking ciggies like it was CBGBs 1977. how punk.

just, um, don't put money on his commissary!! you should spend that shit on bubble baths, hair dye, nail polish, fake eyelashes, high heels, trips to the drive-in movie theatre, glow sticks, comfy non-skid house slippers, a yacht, cheeseburgers, magic spells, snow tires for the gravedigger, the movie titanic, bathroom caulk, candy, unpaid parking tickets, a complete thanksgiving meal, an albino sphynx, books on learning portuguese, a pony, a gustav klimt painting, cold medicine, a cruise to the bahamas, groceries, a new pair of ballet slippers, a better world perspective, a john bonham-worthy drum set, lip gloss......do you see where i am going with this?? spend your money on anything else! i mean, shit, can i get something?

she's the type of person you want to be friends with. writes your ass letters and makes sure you have some junk food. next she'll flash him during visitation and give him a stripper-style lapdance. oh wait........

these are the days of our doll...

goes on a skate date with holzy

even though the beautiful one is a hella pregnant and it is below zero in arcadia, she skipped on her merry way away from joey today to go skateboarding with holzy in some downtown warehouse that probably looked like a horror movie set and probably also had a rapey vibe.

even though the warehouse is owned by holzy and a group of his lame friends, the two had the place to themselves and skated around for several hours, before returning back to holzyhaus in holzy's luxury automobile.

sodapop and ludo, who joined them at their junior high makeout party, told papers all about it. sodapop said that it was awkward to be there and he felt like they were moments away from kissing the whole time. he also added that the two were listening to R&B music and flirting nonstop with each other. barf. get a hotel room.

ludo didn't have much to comment, just that he pulled hans on the side and warned him about how many guns joey owns. word to the wise.

but still - do you, doll! if your pregnancy hormones are raging and holzy doesn't mind that you have a fiancé, by all means! but, just in case he has any sense of decency, i would get your locks changed now, doll, before joey goes stage 5 OJ psycho on you.

shocker! beautiful one smokes bday clove while pregnant

better than a bday blunt, but still.....

scandalous pictures surfaced from kathleen's birthday party last night, which continued into the wee hours of this morning, of her smoking a clove and she is under all sorts of fire for it! when kathleen woke up this morning, put on her fake eyelashes and strolled into the XERB TV station to make a special appearance on the 10 AM news, i doubt she expected to be face to face with pictures of herself smoking.....only that's exactly how it went down.

she must have been feeling nice, because she began to take questions from the audience about her pregnancy, when one of the anchors asked her about the photo of her puff puff puffing away. you could practically see the train engine steam coming from the doll's ears. she calmly took a breath and told the anchor, "you had better take that photo off of the screen. now."

gulp. she means business. seconds later, the interview was over and the doll stomped off of the stage.

once outside the studio, kathleen told press agents to toilet-papers the anchor's house and then proceeded to give the woman's address. LOL, go doll! revenge is a dish best served piping hot.