doll may have a case of the babies

again............

i am very much wanting to drain the last dollars of my bank account to send kathleen a pregnancy test, because rumor has it she is pregnant again! ugh, this is so 2009 or whatever. of course, as the gods would have it, she's never going to have a white wedding, only instead a shotgun bride. LOL. 
kathleen and joey have been back together for five seconds and although i can swallow them resuming their engagement, i don't know if i can handle this news! the latest headlines in grimaldi are : KATHLEEN RETURNS FROM MONTICELLO WITH BABY BUMP - DOLL'S CAMP NO COMMENT ON BABY #2.
do my eyes decieve me?! baby #2?????????? 
i think this might be a ploy to get attention, but i don't see kathleen's #1 press agent sodapop anywhere in the article, so i can't really tell you if it's true or not. maybe reporters confused him with tricky questioning again. all i know is, baby #1 isn't even done feeding off of the doll's breasts, so how is our girl supposed to make room for baby #2??? i am just confused, intrigued and literally on the edge of my seat for more. 
in a way, i do hope she has a case of the babies and keeps coming down with it. she can then turn the coco cave into the coco family compound and literally become a live-in riot grrrl housewife hybrid. the doll can spend more time planning her revolution from the inside-out, where her children grow up within the highest ranks of society and bring it down  à la fight club. 
the only thing i can say is, in the most recent feature interview in the pretty people club, kathleen was quoted as saying :

"you've got the first scoop," she says, eyeballing ME, "i quit. i'm moving to a cabin in monticello with my babies and there i will be a bride." 

gulp. maybe she'll have a boy who will grow up super gay and she can put him in drag by his fifth birthday. #goals 

doll goes to big gay halloween ball at the riot house

takes joey kiss as her plus one, instead of an eight-ball like she probably wanted

and yes, joey does clean up quite well. i'm slowly working my way back into his corner.

kathleen arrived with a fleet of drag queens, did several interviews on the rainbow carpet about how gays will soon rule the earth and was basically the sparkly fairy of the night. she had several outfit changes, but my favorite look was the number she wore at the after-party. adjusting her halo and like she just stepped off a cloud from heaven, she donned a semi-sun, statue of liberty-esque golden crown. she wore a glittering skintight, flesh-colored dress with a goddess-like, indian-inspired ghoonghat atop her crown, draping down over her shoulders. 

1. kiss yet again looked like he had escaped live from the filming of grease 3 in full costume during the prom scene; but, it was working for him and i applaud his efforts. it is the second time in the history of joey kiss - the first being at the premiere of HEP! - where he looked 75% of decent and i'm very proud. however, i do believe that the reason behind that comes from his raggedy, gutter-inspired rags that he wore at the DIG! premiere and didn't want to be confused for a hobo again.

as for the benefit - it was not just an excuse to put on a costume and do drugs. tickets began at £1,000! there was also a silent auction going on in the beginning of the night, as well as a scholarship giveaway. in all, the event raised £250,000 and the funds will be divided among LGBT centers in arcadia, cielo and the isle of grimaldi.
during her last speech of the night, she thanked the LGBT community (duh) for being a large part of her life - hello! our girl's life is the gays. she has makeup artists, stylists, quetzy's nanny and basically every staff member at the riot house on her team, as well as countless other queens! she also described how she always felt more accepted by the gays than the straighties, which makes complete sense because straight men suck. straight males only utilize 2% of their pea brains. gays, trannies and lesbians are all known to be on the upper echelon of society's VIP list and you don't need to be stephen hawking to figure that one out!

in all, the doll can now fly a rainbow flag - not just her freak flag.

the doll wants to boogie with you!

kathleen has been a writer for as long as we all can remember; a riot grrrl, a mother, a singer, a hotelier...and now you can add activist and philanthrapist to the list! our girl is currently calling for everyone and their gay power bottom brother or boysbian chapstick lesbian sister to buy a ticket to her masquerade ball that she is holding in benefit of her hometown arcadian LGBT chapter.  

the ball will be held on halloween - of course, every gay's favorite holiday because it involves both drinking and costumes! - in the riot house gardens and ballroom - duh - and tickets are rumored to begin at a whopping $5,000 per person. and no, this is not a drill and your eyes do not deceive thee....the price to get in the door truly is as steep as four of my paychecks...i mean, for real doll? you know above average fans like myself can barely afford to feed ourselves sometimes! no way, josé! i cannot afford your upper-echelon shit and am not willing to empty my life savings, just saying...

however, many are tripping over themselves to do just that and the word around the campfire is that there's only 100 tickets left. c'mon, people! this is for the gays! write that check for fire island and cher and sequins! let your inner diva guide you....

anyways, i don't care about whatever the doll has planned for her big gay ball - all i care about is THE OUTFITSSSSS!!! THE LOOKSSSS!!! THE WARDROBE, DAAARLING!! i am going to be living for whatever the hell she wears on that rainbow carpet! also expecting lots of drag realness and dusty older uppity old ass queens flaunting their vintage, studio 54 gay chic halston action. 

see you on october 31! if i win the lottery, i'll be at the doll's table, in a concept look, queening out...