doll may have a case of the babies

again............

i am very much wanting to drain the last dollars of my bank account to send kathleen a pregnancy test, because rumor has it she is pregnant again! ugh, this is so 2009 or whatever. of course, as the gods would have it, she's never going to have a white wedding, only instead a shotgun bride. LOL. 
kathleen and joey have been back together for five seconds and although i can swallow them resuming their engagement, i don't know if i can handle this news! the latest headlines in grimaldi are : KATHLEEN RETURNS FROM MONTICELLO WITH BABY BUMP - DOLL'S CAMP NO COMMENT ON BABY #2.
do my eyes decieve me?! baby #2?????????? 
i think this might be a ploy to get attention, but i don't see kathleen's #1 press agent sodapop anywhere in the article, so i can't really tell you if it's true or not. maybe reporters confused him with tricky questioning again. all i know is, baby #1 isn't even done feeding off of the doll's breasts, so how is our girl supposed to make room for baby #2??? i am just confused, intrigued and literally on the edge of my seat for more. 
in a way, i do hope she has a case of the babies and keeps coming down with it. she can then turn the coco cave into the coco family compound and literally become a live-in riot grrrl housewife hybrid. the doll can spend more time planning her revolution from the inside-out, where her children grow up within the highest ranks of society and bring it down  à la fight club. 
the only thing i can say is, in the most recent feature interview in the pretty people club, kathleen was quoted as saying :

"you've got the first scoop," she says, eyeballing ME, "i quit. i'm moving to a cabin in monticello with my babies and there i will be a bride." 

gulp. maybe she'll have a boy who will grow up super gay and she can put him in drag by his fifth birthday. #goals 

doll goes to big gay halloween ball at the riot house

takes joey kiss as her plus one, instead of an eight-ball like she probably wanted

and yes, joey does clean up quite well. i'm slowly working my way back into his corner.

kathleen arrived with a fleet of drag queens, did several interviews on the rainbow carpet about how gays will soon rule the earth and was basically the sparkly fairy of the night. she had several outfit changes, but my favorite look was the number she wore at the after-party. adjusting her halo and like she just stepped off a cloud from heaven, she donned a semi-sun, statue of liberty-esque golden crown. she wore a glittering skintight, flesh-colored dress with a goddess-like, indian-inspired ghoonghat atop her crown, draping down over her shoulders. 

1. kiss yet again looked like he had escaped live from the filming of grease 3 in full costume during the prom scene; but, it was working for him and i applaud his efforts. it is the second time in the history of joey kiss - the first being at the premiere of HEP! - where he looked 75% of decent and i'm very proud. however, i do believe that the reason behind that comes from his raggedy, gutter-inspired rags that he wore at the DIG! premiere and didn't want to be confused for a hobo again.

as for the benefit - it was not just an excuse to put on a costume and do drugs. tickets began at £1,000! there was also a silent auction going on in the beginning of the night, as well as a scholarship giveaway. in all, the event raised £250,000 and the funds will be divided among LGBT centers in arcadia, cielo and the isle of grimaldi.
during her last speech of the night, she thanked the LGBT community (duh) for being a large part of her life - hello! our girl's life is the gays. she has makeup artists, stylists, quetzy's nanny and basically every staff member at the riot house on her team, as well as countless other queens! she also described how she always felt more accepted by the gays than the straighties, which makes complete sense because straight men suck. straight males only utilize 2% of their pea brains. gays, trannies and lesbians are all known to be on the upper echelon of society's VIP list and you don't need to be stephen hawking to figure that one out!

in all, the doll can now fly a rainbow flag - not just her freak flag.

candy camp and rainbow coalition soft launch

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during grimaldi's gay pride weekend

kathleen was once asked in an interview that if she could be anyone - alive or dead - who would she choose? she answered, "a drag queen." makes sense. she loves her gays and has most of the top tops, bottoms, trannies, homosexuals and fierce lesbians in her corner or on her payroll. because no one does makeup like a drag queen! so it's only natural her latest endeavor is as gay as the annual fire island halloween barn dance. 

candy camp, the nightclub, opened it's glittery revolving doors on sunday morning for a preview of what will eventually be, as the nightclub is still under construction. only the first floor was open and the event featured a brunch, a drag show and a gay pride parade gaythering and pre-party that kathleen attended in a pair of pasties and a PVC skirt, which if you ask me, was worth the price of the ticket alone. and no, she wasn't grand marshall of the parade or the host of the main stage - she was spreading rainbows in the bungalow and singing sister sledge's "we are family" on kareoke. werk! 

candy camp nightclub will feature seven rooms with different themes - IE: disco, hip hop, rave, cher - framed famous queens on the walls and the uniform for the bartenders is a throwback to the orginial days of the riot house : golden sequined hotpants! all the bartenders are already famous in grimaldi and known as the raimbow coaltion, which is definitely fitting. in additon to the club, there is an outdoor bamboo patio and bungalow hut wit. flying above the establishment? a giant rainblow flag. it's basically as gay as you can get. 

so you'll basically find me, once candy camp officially opens, with the spirit of trotsky and johnny kiss at bar number 3 on any given wednesday night. 

candy camp to open on the isle of grimaldi

kathleen has had her fingers in a lot of pies over the years and 2k16 is no different for her

she is in talks with her management company, famed hotelier and riot house fam, rudy von rubideaux, to open a new nightclub in the trendy area of downtown grimaldi by 2017, to be named 'candy camp.' apparently, candy camp is another term for jail or rehab among the hep community and now it'll also be known as the #1 place to shoot up, get a refreshing cocktail and possibly catch a glimpse of the one and only doll! 
candy camp is sure to be a hit and not just because the doll waved her wand over it. rumor has it that the club will be built facing the ocean, with wraparound balconies for patrons and an escape tunnel for VIP guests. the best part? kathleen already announced it will be the isle's first official gay bar, will fly a rainbow flag and will host a drag show and champagne brunch every sunday. i love it. she's always been a straight girl at a gay party and now she'll finally be seeing some cashola from it!
this really isn't why i am writing this - word around the campfire is that kathleen has pushed for the opening to be on gay pride weekend in grimaldi...and not only that! those in the know have said that she is asking all of her male cohorts to do drag - and not fuck it up. i am telling you now that if this is true, i will gladly drain the war bonds my great grandmother gifted me for a bullshit coach flight to grimaldi and a ticket to see that show! joey kiss as kathleen's drag daughter is the stuff dreams are made of!