doll drafts first 'shitlist'

and baby daddy joey is surprisingly not on it!!!!!!!!

kathleen has always done her best to be a private grrrl, but most of the time, ends up coming off as an opinionated, loudmouthed, emotionally slutty basket case archetype - and that's okay! i love her no matter how schizo she is. but the same might not be said for the men in her life....
our doll is definitely no stranger to heartbreak and has been definitely dealt a shitty hand when it comes to relationships as of late. ever since she dumped that no-good baby daddy joey kiss, it's like a curse was put over her head and she has been sent toad after toad! so, it's no surprise that she's taken to her soapbox to proclaim who's a big dick and who's a bigger dick in her love life.

in this month's pretty people club magazine, you can find kathleen's 'shitlist' in it's entirety - complete with photos - but here's the hightlights : 

gio giotto - this septum-wearing slimy snail will tell you he loves you in one breath and then tell you he needs to be single in another. YAWN! been there, done that and burned my bra.

bae baebel - honorable mention. waste of space. waste of time. just a waste.

sodapop cola - i don't know how i'm related to you sometimes. i would gladly pay for a vocal chord removal though!

jimmy kiss - you're the worst of the worst! should be #1 but you will never be #1 in my heart LMAO! you were the first and this is the last time i'll mention it.

what the hell? where is miss congeniality - joey kiss? is he headlining the list or something? he should be on it just for giving his baby mama so much grief and basically being the sole reason she is prescribed xanax. 

joey sneaks into the doll's house at night...

...scares the shit out of her

kathleen said she awoke to several messages from joey, stating that he was outside to see her, that he knew he was still awake; and then the final, and creepiest, that he saw her turn her lights out. gulp. 
the doll then attempted to page a sleeping headlock to phone security or police or both, later informing them that after she ignored the messages, joey appeared in her room - naturally, it woke her up and probably has her investing in a bedside gun right about now.
kathleen told headlock, who later told sodapop, who later told reporters that joey stated he was there because he had a key and saw no reason he should not be allowed inside.
i'm sure this is the moment that our girl also decided to fire her entire security staff. and get grandpa headlock a better hearing aid. wow. 
the doll had the last laugh, of course - as joey was leaving her property, reporters caught her on film commenting to joey, "good luck to your new girlfriend!" LOL, more like if she's smart, she'll get the restraining order now!!

g. giotto rates the doll

and no, she's not a "perfect 10" girl

even though GG might have a trust fund waiting in cielo, no one in arcadia has heard of him...so allow him to introduce himself! and introduce himself he did, outside of the dollhouse today. a plethora of reporters were gathered, not in his honor like he probably hoped, asking a boatload of questions about our girl. 

giotto remained a gentleman and wasn't kissing and telling, until one asked, "one a scale of 1-10, how would you rate the doll?"
cue his response : "9 out of 10 - because no one is perfect." 
WUT. 

okay joey kiss and i really hope he's joking because the doll is obviously a 100 on a scale of 1-10. wow. i am kind of doubting this gianni's credibility. even though i am still a little stunned by his hypnotizing exotic hotness and raw sex appeal, and kind of glad kathleen is finally getting some on the reg, i am really wondering if he is worth all the fuss. 

of course "those close" - aka sodapop anywhere, anytime - to baby babble said that gianni is super cool to her and is a step up from joey. i don't want to sound like a bitch but, um, joey didn't have a job for a decent amount of their relationship!! and he was strung out! and he looked like he could pass for any punk junkie extra from any generic 1950s motorcycle greaser film. so what if gianni brings her a coffee in the morning and brings his own condoms? joey chopped the doll's lines and that's real love. 

whatever. i guess at least gianni has muscle mass. he looks like he gets three squares a day and that's not counting the doll. LOL. i mean, he looks like he could at least give the doll a decent piggyback ride around the riot house, and that's #1 on her list of turn-ons...

anyways, point is it sounds like the two are getting along swell and joey will just have to bury his head in the sand and wait for gianni to do something stupid; not because he is stupid, but because he completely looks the type. 

g. giotto sends doll sexy naked mirror selfie

joey kiss is going 2 be so jealous!! 

after writing about joey kiss' sad foray back into heroin addiction the other week - and also him looking like a homeless and confused wet mop in his brother's clothes -  i really didn't think i would have to write about a more eyebrow-raising situation for quite some time...
...and then gianni giotto walked in naked and joey kiss was like, "goodbye - farewell! i'll let the homeboy GG take it from here". 

the doll was recently snapped at the cielan riot house, locking lips with giotto and eventually getting slapped around by him, kinky-style. most people speculated that she was on the verge of dumping joey because he was jailed for heroin possesion, but kathleen said, "guess again!" when, on monday, she went to visit joey in jail and then turned heel to hang with gianni. nice.

and now it's come out in the papers that on her birthday, gianni sent the doll not one, not two, but three thirsty-as-hell nudie mirror selfies that - you guessed it - were leaked on the internet. the photos, along with a snap of the couple at the doll's birthday party were later deleted. either way, joey is going to love this.

i'm sure the beautiful one can explain some kissing and love bruises, but after the leaked nudes, i doubt she can explain gianni's giant salami plastered all over the web! 

especially if said salami was anywhere near her person...real talk...

anyways, who knows if the kisses will stay together, break up, be friends, whatever. all i know is, i saw the NSFW pic of GG and i could care less! kathleen act like she needs hard dick half the time and gianni definitely has some! she needs to drop her panties in his direction!!

as for joey, it's unfortunate that he's a kiss and has a natural disposition to be a fuck-up. unless he's packing more than giotto - which i seriously doubt - he needs to start racking whatever braincells he has left to keep his girl by his side! 

because if i was her, i would already be in that hot piece gianni's bed with little to no clothes on, for real real, not for play play.