the king of queen of all that is wild and witchy do ball for grimaldi's debutantes
for an eye-roll worthy event styled after a high school prom - i know, the doll was probably so psyched - that kathleen and joey ended up traveling all the way to the isle of grimaldi to attend, it was worth it in the end - arcadia's #1 couple were chosen as prom king and queen!
the shindig was pretty much a debutante's ball for the young and underground artists of grimaldi to get their names in the industry; though the who's who of the entire galaxy was involved. speeches were made, toasts were given, awards were doled out and sammy "third degree" burns - owner of hep parade magazine and former employer of wild honeypie -was honored as a patron of the arts; but all eyes were on the kisses as they entered the scene forty-five minutes late, only to interrupt biggles von biba - bassist for band, the flowers of evil - mid-sentence.
in her defense, i will say that not doing cocaine anymore has definitely given her more time to focus on her true calling : getting under people's skin. taking her sweet time to find her seat, kathleen managed to displease a handful of audience members in record time - at one point, someone even yelled at her to 'go home!' that comment must have gone over her head, though, because i was left speechless when she didn't summon her loyal demons from the blazes of limbo to cut the guilty party's tongue out.
the doll spent her first leg of the night making small talk with other guests at and around her table - which included fellow arcadians rocko j. nasty and rudy rubideaux - before she progressed closer and closer towards the stage. what happened next surely could not be avoided, as baby babble beset the stage and snatched the microphone away. she used her outside voice to say, "i deserve every award there is - i am the doll! i say this because i am the one who makes the money, who puts words on paper; i am a god, i have a great lawyer and more beautiful than any of you!" and then dedicated the moment to trotsky; after waving to the cameras, she joked, "hi, trots - i hope they have TVs in hell!"
the kisses wrapped their tour of the ball by accepting the coveted title of best new artist - known exclusively as the prom king or queen award in the business - and the doll won by a landslide. kathleen and joey graced that stage and baby babble, living up to her nickname, commanded the podium for a lot longer than she should have. i was half expecting the producers to cut the feed for the microphone and dub music over the doll's prattle; but, right when she was about to lose me, she folded up her collapsible soapbox and brought the crowd down - she earned a standing ovation with, "i want to dedicate being queen of the prom to the best gal pal i've ever had - trotsky. he's probably kicking himself in heaven that he's not here to wear my crown and sash for me." that was really sweet of her - i'm sure to counteract such a phenomenon, grimaldi's prom queen did something really mean after walking offstage.