doll to write another book

rumored to be called last of the arcady roses

this is one piece of news that i am happy to report, but also know that it won't truly be of relevance until, like, 2021. seriously...the girl takes five-ever to produce some content, albeit gold. regardless, kathleen released word today that she will be penning a third book. this obviously piqued fans' and critics' interests alike, as her smiley book and heart + arrow book have sold over 50 million copies worldwide. imagine how many 8-balls that could buy! 

it makes sense, as people are getting pretty bored and pretty inventive since the doll has been taking some of her summer vacation in monticello. it's probably these same "sources" that have also come up with all sorts of stories in her absense. there's been a story that she's knocked up...again. there's a story that she's leaving the entertainment industry to become barefoot and probably pregnant...again...and live off the land and off the grid. and then there was a story - most likely coming from the 1-800-SODAPOP hotline - that there might be a widespread shortage of heroin and cocaine soon, if you know what i mean! LOL.
doesn't it go without saying, though, that kathleen does drugs??????? i don't need any external affirmations! do you? maybe it'll be in her next book! don't hold your breath!! 

do you remember the flower children? the freaks? the pretty people?

do you remember kathleen's original group of pretty people, which included, but was not limited to :

• flower children

• punks

• bikies

• pretty and beautiful people

• kinderwhores 

• grrrls 

• silver-spooners

• club brats

• disco dollies

• freaks and weirdos 

• grunge-o's

if you don't remember - basically kathleen's camp of hangers-on got so large at one point that she moved them all to a commune in monticello where they could live off of the land and not her land, feel me?
the commune was called a lot of things, but "the freak farm" seemed to stick.
anyways, they're still at large in monticello after...oh, you know...the freak fest that was totally freaky and totally festy in 2012. you know what else it was? it was a total shitshow nightmare from pigfuck land and that's putting it with some sugar on top.
with kathleen creeping around monticello lately - and she has been creeping - a lot of people are wondering if it's going to be freak fest, the remix this summer. so far, the doll camp has yet to issue a statement.
jimmy kiss joked to the papers, though, the other day that the famous couple will soon be back snatching headlines "freaky fast." 
so, be ready to drain your life savings fund and/or inheritance from your namesake, because if there's a freak fest II, you can best believe that means £10 waters, £20 slices of pizza and £50 for a measly hit of acid! whatta rip!

everything you need to know about "the doll diaries"

"the doll diaries" via the pretty people club via the doll via true life stories

kathleen is the type of person who, if in your home unsupervised, would snoop through your entire life and read your journal. now it's our turn.

i kid you not, but that is the actual promotional tagline for her upcoming series of articles. and yes, they will be ripped from the pages of the doll's own journal. i know what you're thinking : 

never before has she done anything like this - the first copy of the magazine, which hasn't even gone to print, has already sold-out. the head of PR for pretty people said that only 1,000 copies were being put into circulation and, well, it is what it is, folks! better luck next time!

little has been released, but there's been several teasers floated around recent copies of hep parade outlining the entries. no, sadly it's not full of handcrafted love spells, poems based off of mushroom trips and unfinished lyrics to riot grrrl songs...it was more her pining about jimmy kiss, talking about her tarot card readings and being a generally mystifying creature. i had really hoped it was full of inner monologue from shit like private jet trips, arguments with other celebrities, A-list parties...who's a big bitch, who's sleeping with who and who is one what medications.

there's some of that. but then there's some painful stuff to read that cuts deep at times truly. she's not immune to public opinion and, contrary to urban legend, actually has feelings. she's flesh and blood just like you or me. newsflash!

still, a lot of fans feel this comes in the wake of her revealing she's back with old beau, jimmy kiss. that, even though she's willing to momentarily sacrifice her privacy, she has ulterior motives. there's been a lot of talk for a lot of months that this is another famous doll publicity stunt, done just despite joey, la la la. i don't know, i don't care, i'm just here to report the facts, people! 

PS: i'd much rather read her diaries than her fanmail, just saying.