originally written january 21, 2017
9:04 PM
jimmy stopped by the house here in arcadia to borrow some old records and we ended up going to dinner. as if no time had passed, we ducked the photogs staked outside the gated and all that...the old drill. headlock just shook his head when i told him. you can't see me right now but i'm shrugging. i dunno. i'll always love him. he's apart of me.
i have to leave and come back for a pretty people club shoot. was thinking about hiring jimmy.
"soon, soon...the unsweet by and by" -@heavyhorse
11:07985562781 PM
did i tell ya he sent me a love letter? it was misspelled, full of references even i, yours truly, didn't 'get', but laden with underlying love and mystery. my favorites.
he sent it to me about a month ago.
i was too busy fighting off pregnancy rumors and drug rumors and wedding rumors and joey suicide rumors. or were they rumours? were they not whispers, echoing through the hidden glades of cielo and arcadia? and have they not been uttered for years, just in different variations?
i'm no good at being alone. jimmy is well aware.
he's my waterloo, like they say...which would make me his gypsy lane...
10:11 PM
it took me at least an hour and then the amount of time to smoke a cigarette to find that damned love letter.
still, the words are destined for me and me alone. so i shall only post an excerpt :
"the stress of longing...
coarse as you were down the old canal, you were the river and i was fine...
at the harbour deep and mine...
you're estranged and i am fine.
you must be a stranger or broken-hearted. the uschi of my dreams.
kissy kissy."
11:46 PM
super duper cryptic, wouldn't you agree? i have to admit it made me shake and shiver. he always knows just what to say to me to make me melt. what a funny relationship. i sometimes wonder myself...how long we'll do this dance. he;s my favorite person - my greatest feature.
my muse? surely.
