as so cryptically revealed in this week's hep parade magazine, as well as other highly accredited sources, we now know the reason why kathleen is not getting freaky with jimmy kiss anymore - it's because she's getting freaky with loyal the lost boy!
the lost boys, according to street legend, are a pack of young, greasy trainhopping punks who roam the streets in search of the wayward american dream. they busk for their dope dinner, possess only the clothes on their backs and if you believe the word around the campfire, they are here for the doll. she gave them a regular gig at the riot house every tuesday. there are rumors flying around that they will help her and the pretty people create a festival to take place sometime during this summer.
now, even though jimmy has moved all of his worldly belongings - two trilbies, a pair of black denim jeans and his most-cherished dinger - back into the love shack, that does not mean she's still his baby babble. she proved that last night after she let loyal get to second base. hey, she's not sharing needles with jimmy anymore - she's a free agent.
the best part of the night came at the riot house nightclub - flashers have been pressuring the doll all week to come clean about her relationship with loyal. she must be tired of all the bullying, because she took the opportunity to say, "well, he did give me his knife - since the piggies took mine away," and then she pulled her knife out from the sheath on her hip. you know none of those photographers were the least bit scared; kathleen's had them knocking on death's door more times than few.
and, that knife isn't the only thing he gave her - someone forgot to mention the addition of one filthy, stinking bandanna to her wardrobe, which she proudly decided to sport last night like some sort of cute necklace, when it was anything but. hopefully she decides to retire this look soon, or else...